Long Distance Love

Many of our ancestors came to the United States under less than favorable conditions. Some came with family, or alone ferrying other members over one at a time. Others came with nothing but the clothing on their backs. Some of our ancestors were brought over in chains involuntarily, families ripped apart. . .to say that this transition was difficult was an understatement no matter the circumstance. We can't really fathom the instability of a developing nation. Our lives are so comfortable by comparison. I think of the challenges of daily seasonal survival, and what that must have been like. A harsh winter could take out an entire branch of a family tree due to illness. There were no safety features on wagons, trains, and eventually automobiles, so you can only imagine the amount of fatalities that occurred. Imagine the industrial revolution without the benefit of safe equipment, proper working conditions, unions, etc. And then there were the wars. . . I shudder to think of all the lives lost and families broken because of it. And of course lets not forget our indigenous population who lost their family and homes as we gained ours. . .

There were so many factors compressing the family unit. Units were strong because they had to be. Communication was a imperative whether it be by messenger, telegram, mail, or carrier pigeon. (Incidentally even carrying the mail via pony express was considered dangerous. You had to be "willing to risk death daily" to be considered for the job!) Suffice it to say of you weren't fighting for daily existence you were waiting to hear how your family was faring with theirs. It could take months to hear from extended family, but it didn't deter our ancestors from writing to "keep in touch." Families had a sense that they were fighting for the same thing. The shared success and struggle made the family unit stronger.

Our lives are luxurious by comparison. Technology has seen to it that we are able to communicate as far as want, when we want, as fast as we want. We have so many choices too. We can email, text, DM, Face Time, or use good old fashioned snail mail. We also have the blessing of having these things at our fingertips all at once! Despite this, many of us have family that we don't really know or have a relationship with because of distance! Distance can be a big deterrent in developing family relationships, but it doesn't have to be with just the slightest bit of effort.

Lookey here! I took this picture on FaceTime by the way so they are looking at me!

This is my baby brother and is six beautiful children. They live live in Idaho a whopping 2238.2 miles away. It is a challenge to stay in touch but look at those faces! My brother and his wife are doing an excellent job of raising smart, talented, funny, caring, and capable human beings. It would be sad NOT to bear witness to some of it. Plus I don't want to be the ambiguous aunt in New Jersey that they don't really know. I want them to grow to love and appreciate me as much as their relatives that live close to them. We are family and that network spans across miles. I hope one day they can take comfort in that.

So what are you going to do? Are you going to be the one to take the first steps to building strong, loving, communicative relationships in your family. I can tell you that it is a challenge. You have to keep YOUR goal in mind and leave ego out of it. Do not be concerned with reciprocity because sometimes that doesn't happen.( Rome wasn't built in a day). Let love be your guide and I promise you will see results.